Even though you have ten thousand guardians in Christ, you do not have many fathers, for in Christ Jesus I became your father through the gospel. Therefore I urge you to imitate me.
1 Corinthians 4:15-17

Who is a spiritual father? (For ease of communication I’m using the term “father” but I’m really speaking of both men and women, father and mothers) Some people will say that he is a person with white hair. But I don’t think age is the most important thing in determining who is a father. To me the heart of a true father is simple: someone who wants to see his children excel beyond what he has done and when they do, he is not jealous but rejoices.

With my natural dad, I had an amazing example of this. When I was trying to do something that was difficult in the natural, maybe beyond my current ability, my dad would come alongside me and say “Don’t quit David. Go for it.” And when I was afraid to try because I didn’t want to fail, he would say “I’m with you.” And if I said, “Dad it’s too hard and if you couldn’t do it, how can I?” Then he would look at me and say, “David, I didn’t have someone to stand behind me and support me and push me forward. And don’t worry, if you fall I will carry you in my arms”. And many times to my amazement I was able to complete things I thought were impossible. And what was more amazing is that the pleasure it brought to my dad’s heart was 100x more than if I had done it myself. And I always felt like we owned the victory together.

I believe every generation’s success and greatest satisfaction is measured not by how well they do but by how well their children do. If the next generation does less than the previous one, then the older generation has failed in its primary responsibility – to train and release the next generation to their full potential.

Even Jesus Himself said we would do greater works than He did. It’s obviously not because we have a greater anointing but because Jesus’ great pleasure was to see the church advance from glory to glory, from faith to faith. So he wasn’t threatened by his disciples doing better than him. He was secure in His identity relative to the Father. And the same needs to be said of spiritual fathers and mothers. When we are secure in our identity we won’t feel threatened by the younger generation.

As I shared yesterday, when I met Pastor Bob I found a father who wanted to walk with me to see me released to the fullness of what God has called me for and not simply to fulfill his own vision. Some leaders have such big visions they can’t fulfill them on their own. So they look for younger people with anointing to walk with them. But deep in their hearts they aren’t interested in mentoring, they are interested in using them to fulfill their own visions.

I know that some of us have wanted to walk as fathers but we’ve been unsure how to do so because we were never fathered ourselves. So we have left the younger generations, especially Gen X, to struggle alone and be hurt by the enemy, perpetuating the cycle of fatherlessness.

I believe there is a window the Lord is opening right now to redeem things in particular between the fathers generation (boomers and builders) and the Gen X (late twenties to early forties). The enemy wants to lie to us that it’s too late, tell us that Gen Xers have found their own way and they don’t need us. Or he wants to make us feel guilty for leaving them fatherless and tell us that it’s too hard to go back and restore things and that it’s easier to just reach out to the youth. But I know there is a deep God-given longing in Gen X to walk with the fathers and it’s important that we don’t overlook them at this time.

I believe as fathers we need to lay down our fears or feelings of regret and trust God that if we choose to come into alignment with His heart for us as fathers, He is able to redeem all the years that were lost through the curse of not walking together.

And I will restore to you the years that the locust hath eaten, the cankerworm, and the caterpillar, and the palmerworm, my great army which I sent among you. And ye shall eat in plenty, and be satisfied, and praise the name of the LORD your God, that hath dealt wondrously with you: and my people shall never be ashamed. Joel 2:25-26

We will talk more in the next few days about what the Lord is speaking to us practically now about how to walk with and release Gen X. But as a first step I would like to pray with all those who are fathers and mothers and who feel a witness that the Lord wants to give you a greater revelation of how to walk with the younger generation. If this is your heart, please pray this prayer with me:

God I humble myself before you. I ask you Lord to forgive me for the ways in which I have not taken my place as a spiritual father/mother representing your heart to the next generation. Forgive me for being selfish, for times when I was caught up in my own vision, my own journey and I was not the father/mother I needed to be. I ask you Lord to redeem and restore every lost opportunity. I thank you Lord for the multitudes of spiritual fathers and mothers in this nation whom you are raising up to lay down their lives to serve the next generation and I commit before you God to be one of those.

Now let’s make this declaration together in the spirit to the next generation.

As fathers and mothers we choose not to think of ourselves but to think of the covering and protection of the next generation. For your sake, we will rise up, for your sake we will get our act together. For your sake, we will be true fathers and mothers. We will be there for you when you need us. We will release you, not to walk alone but to be there with you as you run in all God has called you to. We will hold your hand and when you fall, we will be there to lift you up. We declare that Gen X will not be left fatherless in Canada but we, the fathers and mothers will hear the trumpet call in the spirit and rise up for such a time as this.

Watch a video clip from the Sound DVD of David sharing about his experience with spiritual fathers. High bandwidth Low bandwidth

David Demian is a man of singular passion: to be a friend of God. This passion has led him on an amazing journey in life and ministry.  David is a spiritual son to the founder of Watchmen for the Nations, Pastor Bob Birch, who passed the mantle of leadership of the ministry to David in 1998.  David lives in Vancouver, BC, Canada with his wife Ruth and seven children. 

David can be reached by email at director@watchmen.org.